This blog is about ‘feeling alone’
I often feel alone/lonely its a feeling that always returns, I’ve had the feeling of feeling alone for a very long time since school and I left secondary school at 16 in 2006.
I have a few friends and I have a loving family but I feel like I have nobody at times which is sad.
I compare myself to others who have lots of friends who seem happy and who can socialise and especially with those who haven’t got a learning disability/mental health problems.
I have kept my few friends for many years they mean everything to me but I tend to wish I had more friends I could see and socialise with but a plus side to that I made a friend in the past year who’s been a real great friend to me.
I wish I could think more positive to think of the great things about having family and a few close friends, but I rarely think of positives.
I am not in a relationship I haven’t had one for many years one, due to the problems I have had I do want one but I always feel nobody would want me with my history of self harm, mental health, my bad negative thoughts, and so on..I have had a few relationships previously but they never worked out and one really affected me mentally which stays with me to this day in what he did and what he said to me, it was in 2008, I feel thats the reason I am lonely a lot of the time is that I have nobody to see on a regular basis – I have a friend who lives in Swindon who I see monthly but I feel a month is a long time to see a friend, but my friend in Swindon knows how to make me smile and make me feel good.
I hope one day I can feel content in the way I am and to accept myself for who I am and accept the small amount of friends I have, and stop comparing myself to others who may not be 100% happy themselves.